This new site didn’t turn out exactly as I’d planned. I envisioned something more like Tom Waits’ or Nick Cave’s website. The goal was to promote my music, poetry, and songwriting. But that’s the way it is with creative endeavors. Things don’t always turn out as planned. Plus, I’m not Tom Waits or Nick Cave. It’s okay, because at it’s core, this new site is actually an exercise in letting go.
Everything else is secondary and will come in time.
Here are few of the things that I’m letting go:
- I’m letting go of preconceived ideas of who I am and who I think I should be.
- I’m letting go of things from my past that I’ve let cast shadows on my present.
- I’m letting go of the expectations of pre-made templates and formulas.
- I’m letting go of others’ views that make one feel judged as lesser than.
- I’m letting go of guilt and shame that was projected onto me by others.
I’m letting go.
Now that the initial excitement of this new venture is winding down a little, I can ease back and continue letting go. I started with a flurry of short essays. I may slow down the pace, or maybe I’ll write even more. Essays were not part of the original vision, but I do like how things have developed. Deep down, I’m a writer, and that will always come out in one way or another.
Maybe, it’s time to start experimenting with some of my own photography for the site? And of course, I’ll continue to work on music. Music was the original intention for this site: a musician’s page. Unfortunately, COVID-19 has put a damper on playing live gigs anytime in the near future.
Most of all, I’ll continue letting go and letting things develop as they will.
Peace. – dse
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