New music from Anderhill, Coalescence has a vibe that is reminiscent of 2019’s Time & Texture and 2022’s Absence, with a new and unique vibe of its own.
The EP has a meditative quality. I make use of minimalist drum samples. The odd tracks have custom drum programming. For the even tracks I chose random drum loops. The sound is definitely darker than Time and Texture, but it also has a lightness about it. I invite you to take a listen.
Also, check out my new site, G L I T C . S H. You’ll find a combination or poetry, art, and music that uses both glitch and brutalism. – dse
A couple of months ago I bought an 80’s style boombox. It’s a big yellow Aiwa. Why? Because I have a ton of old cassette and CD demo recordings that I want to share on my YouTube Channel. Introducing Songs from Big Yellow.
I’ve already posted a review of the boombox and about three or four old demo recordings from 1986 and 1987. I have a lot more demos to post from big yellow in the future ranging from the late 80s into the 2000s.
The demos represent recordings with my older brother, Paul Erickson, my younger brother, Pete Erickson, and friends like JB Taylor, Mike Schecnk, John Hauge, and Laddie Ray Melvin. I might post a few solo demos as well.
If you go to my YouTube, you can check out the whole playlist. Expect that list to grow for weeks and months to come. – dse
I’ve had my YouTube Channel for one year. I started it on January 18, 2025. I have mixed feelings about the channel. Sometimes, it feels so insignificant to be creating art and music in today’s America.
I’ve always struggled with feelings of vanity.
I blogged about minimalism for about five years. I quit when I got close to making money from my work. Why? Because it felt wrong to sell people something that anyone can do for free. Want to live simple? Here, buy my gadget. It seemed hypocritical. It felt vain.
That’s about as close as I’ve gotten to monetizing anything on the Internet. Sure, I’ve sold a few books and some music on Bandcamp, but that might add up to a couple thousand dollars in sales over 15 years. The truth is, ever since giving up the minimalist topic, I’ve struggled in general with both topic and audience.
I lost 95% of my audience when I gave up minimalism as a niche. Then I floundered for a few years on what to do next. I finally decided to simply focus on my own music, poetry, and songwriting. And as you might expect, being an unknown artist in your 60s in today’s world is not profitable. And even if it was, that feels like selling out.
YouTube is no different than anything else.
Starting a YouTube Channel has been interesting, even fun at times. I didn’t put a lot into the equipment or production, but purposefully kept things simple and raw. Unfortunately, that’s another strike against me. People want flashy and produced.
After a year, it’s plain to see, that just like starting a blog, a podcast, or any kind of potential online business, I’m highly unlikely to ever gain an audience or turn a profit on the Internet. I don’t know the stats, but my guess would be that less than 1% of the people who try to create some kind of online business ever make any money. So, like my other online endeavors, it feels vain to even try.
Of course, from the outset, I said my YouTube was simply a place to document and preserve a lifetime of songwriting and that I had no delusions of making it a profitable channel. That remains true. But if I’m being 100% honest, there was still a small part of me that thought the experiment might get more than 100 subscribers in a year.
Maybe there’s more important work.
I’m not going to quit, but I am dialing things back. It takes time and effort, even with raw and unedited video, to keep a YouTube channel going. But I also can’t help but look around at the state of this world, and more specifically America, and wonder if there’s something more important I could be doing.
People tell me that art is important, that songs and poetry can lead revolutions and save lives. Meh. I’m not seeing it. When 20 million people are struggling just to be heard and no one seems to have the attention span to listen, what’s the point? And to do this stuff just for myself can become both isolating and lonely.
When I look around at what’s happening in our country; when I see the hate, the poverty, and the hopelessness, I have to wonder if there is something else one could do to promote positive change.
Now I’m retired, the options have increased.
I stopped working full time on December 1, 2025. I’ll likely go back to work part time later this year when I move back to Maine. I need to subsidize my income to pay for health insurance for a couple more years. But I will have more freedom to do other things.
Part of me just wants to go travel and explore a few places I’ve long been interested in. But another part of me wants to do something more significant, maybe get involved with some kind of activism at the grassroots level.
I’ve threatened for years to walk away from the Internet when I’m retired. That’s probably unpractical. And even though very few seem to notice what I’m doing, what I do is still serving a purpose, if only some kind of self-therapy.
I know I must sound like a broken record. I tend to continually question my own place in this world as a creator. I constantly see the insignificance of our struggle as artists and human beings. We all simply die and will likely be forgotten in the end.
Still, I’ll keep plugging along. I won’t stop writing or give up on YouTube yet. But I will keep my eyes and mind open for new directions and ways to serve others. – dse
I started a YouTube Channel in mid-January of this year. I don’t get a ton of views but I’ll post links to my most-watched videos here. The first three links are the most viewed. I’ll follow those with the top-ten most-played songs.
My goal was never to attempt to get views and create a popular channel, but rather simply to catalog songs and post some about songwriting and music.
I posted a total of 199 videos in 2025 and gained 93 subscribers. Again, getting subscribers was not the primary reason for starting the channel. Documenting my own songwriting journey was.
I officially retiredfrom full-time work on December 1. Shortly after I stopped working in early November, I almost doubled my output on the channel. I could keep that up. But I’m not going to. Why?
Although I was tempted to try to start building the channel instead of simply using it for my own space, I’ve decided against that idea for now. In April, I’ll be moving back to Maine. I’ll be busy moving and doing some work on my condo up there. I want to do some traveling. I might go back to work part time. So, I’m not ready to commit to something more than what I’m currently doing on my channel.
That Could Change
I’ve always considered the idea of doing something more with the channel and/or starting a second channel. But I only want to do that if I’ve decided to seriously commit to the project(s).
That would mean that I’d get new and improved equipment, and that I’d create a space specifically as a YouTube studio. I’d study the art of YouTube production and become more deliberate in creating higher-quality work. I’d aim for better video and better audio. I’d learn how to edit. I’d have more scripted videos.
I’m not yet convinced I want to do all that. I need to wait and see what direction life takes after my move back to Maine. Also, a part of me likes the simple lo-fi authenticity of my channel as it is.
So, until mid-2026, I’ve decided to pare back a little and only post a few times per week rather than daily as I did through most of November and December.
I already set my goals for 2026a couple of months back. They are very simple and general. In fact, I’ve already met a few of them and it’s not even 2026 yet. Here’s a review:
10 things I hope to do before the end of next year.
Give my website a simple remodel.
Continue writing and recording songs and music.
Write poetry and consider short story.
Keep walking regularly and participate in other physical activities.
Monitor my health and see experts on my blood condition.
Read on a fairly regular basis.
Consider a second piece of real estate in Kansas or Missouri.
Retire from my current job and move back to Maine.
Create a YouTube Studio in a different location and focus on a few strategies to promote the channel.
Travel and work on becoming a better photographer.
So, #1 is done. #8 is part done. I’ll be taking a photography class starting in January, #10. Many of the other goals are things I simply do on an ongoing basis. See what I did there. I made it nearly impossible not to meet my goals.
There are a few things I want to reevaluate.
Let’s review #2, #7, #9, and add one big thing that I forgot to include.
#2. Continue writing and recording songs and music: Of course, I’m going to continue to do music. The question is at what level? Since I retired, I’ve sped up my output, both in writing and posting to my YouTube channel. I’ve even done some new Anderhill music. I’m not sure I’m going to continue to increase musical output going into 2026. Something is telling me to slow down a bit on the musical output and to focus on quality over quantity.
#7. Consider a second piece of real estate in Kansas or Missouri: This is simply a thought, an option. I often consider real estate in that region for the low cost, and to be close to my first daughter who was stillborn and buried in Joplin, Missouri. But I think in 2026 it will be more important to focus on my property in Maine.
#9. Create a YouTube Studio in a different location and focus on a few strategies to promote the channel: As with #2, I’m not going to stop. However, I’m also not going to put the YouTube channel at a high level of importance. In fact, I’ll be making an announcement on the channel before the end of the year that I will be slowing down output. And chances are fair that I’ll keep the channel simmering on the back burner until after I’ve resettled in Maine. Only then will I decide about the new studio space and the direction of content and promotion.
One important thing I left off the initial list.
I have a small condo in Maine. It’s livable but is also in need of some updates. So, upon my return, I need to start on the process of getting some things done. Here’s a list of things I’d like to consider completing over the next couple of years:
Get electrical and plumbing inspected and repaired.
Get the windows and exterior doors replaced.
Do a partial kitchen remodel and get new appliances.
Get a new shower/tub.
Repaint the entire interior.
Possibly install new flooring downstairs and resurface the stairs.
Replace heating units with new and more efficient models.
Turn the basement area into a YouTube studio instead of a storage area.
Minimize furnishings and decor.
And a few of other things…
Other things I left off my original list because they are not certainties:
Consider getting another dog.
Working part-time either at Cabelas and/or adjunct teaching.
Traveling to Canada, Scotland, and/or Iceland.
So, there you have it. A slightly more specific list of goals for 2026. Again, I do not like to set goals the way I used to. I used to aim too high and set unrealistic goals. I might have met 40% of them. Life is uncertain and keeping your goals loose is a much better option, especially things that are outside of your ability to control.
Don’t set goals you can’t control.
For instance, a few weeks ago, I noticed that my YouTube channel had about 83 subscribers and 180 posts. So, I posted a goal on Facebook. I said by the end of the year I’d have 200 posts and 100 subscribers.
At the rate I’ve been making videos, the 200 posts by the end of the year was very reachable. Still is. But I can’t control how many people subscribe to the channel. It’s gone from 83 to 92 but I don’t expect to reach 100 by December 31. I was setting myself up for failure by making my goals dependent on the actions of others.
This, in part, led me to reevaluate the importance of my YouTube channel. I’ve blogged and I have been caught up in the endless cycle of trying to grow an online presence in the past. I’m not going to let that cycle repeat when I retire. I cannot control the actions of others. I cannot force people to come to my channel. This is not The Field of Dreams.
I started the YouTube channel as a place to catalog songs and discuss things related to songwriting and music, and occasionally, life. I started the channel with no illusions of becoming popular or monetizing. And for now, that’s just how it will remain. And I think I’ll end the year with 199 posts just because I can. – dse
I’ve been thinking a lot lately about the idea of ever “making it” as a songwriter, musician, or writer. What does that even mean? To make it? Then I realized that I already gave up the dream. 100%.
I’ve recently retired and that matters here.
First, I am officially retired from full-time academic work as of December 1, 2025. I’ll have more time on my hands. Time that might allow me to work harder in pursuing my artistic endeavors. And I will.
I’m going to keep my YouTube Channel going. I’m going to keep writing songs. I’ll keep composing ambient music and writing poetry. Maybe, I’ll even write another book. But never again for the reason of trying to “make it.” And only out of the love for the process, and the art.
I work to create a healthy balance in life. I’ll likely continue to do some part-time work. I’m going to do some upgrades to my condo. I’ll travel some. I’ll work more on photography. I might even learn more about how to create a successful YouTube Channel instead of just posting random videos of me singing songs. Who knows? But I’ll decide.
I won’t do any of that in hopes of achieving financial or social success in the industry. Here’s why.
My work is 100% driven by artistic value, not money.
In the past few years I’ve noticed something. I understand that people who have been successful in the music or entertainment industry have worked hard to get there. I also understand that they are busy people. Even those who have not made it, but focus on that commercially-based track to success seem to have similar attitudes toward artists as myself.
They are dismissive.
That’s right. I’ve discovered an underlying unfriendliness among many people I’ve met who have been successful in the music business, or are trying their hardest to make it. I’m not sure exactly why, but I’m going to take a stab at what I think might be going on.
It’s a game of egos, and some people are threatened by purity.
I know some people may disagree, but from clear back in my early blogging days, I noted something. Most bloggers who had already had some success seemed to snub their noses at those who were trying to reach similar levels. Unless you were kissing up to them.
Why? Because their success depended on those who had not “made it.” That’s right. They want you to buy into what they are selling you, their courses, their programs, their coaching. They want you to believe that they are somehow better than you. Even if your raw talent is superior to theirs, they could never admit that. The ego will not allow for it.
I’ve found the same thing within the songwriting and music world. You’re a fan, not a contemporary. I’ve even had the sense that some of the successful artists I have met and worked with in the past few years are intimidated by those of us who have spent our lives mastering the art of something without “selling out.”
When you really think about it, if one has spent 50 years mastering a specific art while the other has had to worry about business, performances, recording, touring, and keeping their base happy, which one has truly had the unadulterated time and space to be more faithful to the art?
Alternative roads are shunned.
I also see that those of us who refuse to take the expected route in the music industry are ignored. The expected route is to spend lots of money to create a product to sell.
In Nashville, you are expected to make a high-quality produced demo. But it wasn’t always that way. Country music publishers used to request nothing more than instrument/vocal demos. Now there is a whole studio industry catering to wannabe songwriters to spend $500 per song.
You’re also expected to play the open mic and songwriting round circuit, and to co-write in an effort to prove yourself to the industry community. The venues where these events happen are selling you hope and dreams and food and beer.
In other words, the songwriters have become the product. The majority of the tens of thousands of songwriters in Nashville will spend thousands of dollars to never make it. I played that game as a younger man. I see through it now.
I think about Woody Guthrie.
Woody Guthrie refused to sell out. Sure, he made a meager living as a songwriter, but he never wrote anything he did not believe in as a means of pursuing commercial success.
Woody stood up for the things he believed in. He simply created whatever he chose. He was never impacted by the lure of success. In fact, he walked off the set when he was expected to play the role of a hayseed and sing commercial songs for a TV show.
Yet, in the end, Guthrie, never really a success in his own right, became a legend, and one of the biggest musical influences for future generations of songwriters.
I’m done dreaming, but I’ll keep on doing.
So that’s it. I’m done dreaming. 100%. But I’ll keep on doing. Or not. I won’t give into pressure to conform. I’m too old for that shit. I’ll write and post what I want when I want. And if I decide to stop doing altogether, that’s my prerogative.
For years I thought I was missing out because I never found much success in my creative endeavors. Now I understand something much more important. I’m free. – dse
