Author: Dan Steven Erickson

I’ve had my YouTube Channel for one year. I started it on January 18, 2025. I have mixed feelings about the channel. Sometimes, it feels so insignificant to be creating art and music in today’s America.

I’ve always struggled with feelings of vanity.

I blogged about minimalism for about five years. I quit when I got close to making money from my work. Why? Because it felt wrong to sell people something that anyone can do for free. Want to live simple? Here, buy my gadget. It seemed hypocritical. It felt vain.

That’s about as close as I’ve gotten to monetizing anything on the Internet. Sure, I’ve sold a few books and some music on Bandcamp, but that might add up to a couple thousand dollars in sales over 15 years. The truth is, ever since giving up the minimalist topic, I’ve struggled in general with both topic and audience.

I lost 95% of my audience when I gave up minimalism as a niche. Then I floundered for a few years on what to do next. I finally decided to simply focus on my own music, poetry, and songwriting. And as you might expect, being an unknown artist in your 60s in today’s world is not profitable. And even if it was, that feels like selling out.

YouTube is no different than anything else.

Starting a YouTube Channel has been interesting, even fun at times. I didn’t put a lot into the equipment or production, but purposefully kept things simple and raw. Unfortunately, that’s another strike against me. People want flashy and produced.

After a year, it’s plain to see, that just like starting a blog, a podcast, or any kind of potential online business, I’m highly unlikely to ever gain an audience or turn a profit on the Internet. I don’t know the stats, but my guess would be that less than 1% of the people who try to create some kind of online business ever make any money. So, like my other online endeavors, it feels vain to even try.

Of course, from the outset, I said my YouTube was simply a place to document and preserve a lifetime of songwriting and that I had no delusions of making it a profitable channel. That remains true. But if I’m being 100% honest, there was still a small part of me that thought the experiment might get more than 100 subscribers in a year.

Maybe there’s more important work.

I’m not going to quit, but I am dialing things back. It takes time and effort, even with raw and unedited video, to keep a YouTube channel going. But I also can’t help but look around at the state of this world, and more specifically America, and wonder if there’s something more important I could be doing.

People tell me that art is important, that songs and poetry can lead revolutions and save lives. Meh. I’m not seeing it. When 20 million people are struggling just to be heard and no one seems to have the attention span to listen, what’s the point? And to do this stuff just for myself can become both isolating and lonely.

When I look around at what’s happening in our country; when I see the hate, the poverty, and the hopelessness, I have to wonder if there is something else one could do to promote positive change.

Now I’m retired, the options have increased.

I stopped working full time on December 1, 2025. I’ll likely go back to work part time later this year when I move back to Maine. I need to subsidize my income to pay for health insurance for a couple more years. But I will have more freedom to do other things.

Part of me just wants to go travel and explore a few places I’ve long been interested in. But another part of me wants to do something more significant, maybe get involved with some kind of activism at the grassroots level.

I’ve threatened for years to walk away from the Internet when I’m retired. That’s probably unpractical. And even though very few seem to notice what I’m doing, what I do is still serving a purpose, if only some kind of self-therapy.

I know I must sound like a broken record. I tend to continually question my own place in this world as a creator. I constantly see the insignificance of our struggle as artists and human beings. We all simply die and will likely be forgotten in the end.

Still, I’ll keep plugging along. I won’t stop writing or give up on YouTube yet. But I will keep my eyes and mind open for new directions and ways to serve others. – dse