You ever feel like you’re on the verge of a change for the good? I often get that feeling. On the other hand, I often feel like the world, and my life, are going to hell. The truth is we are always on the verge of something new. Something is changing.
As a writer, songwriter, and artist, I purposefully attempt to occasionally go outside of the boundaries created by culture and genre. I think that makes one a better creator. Then there are other times when change just seems to come on its own.
We are living in unique times.
With all the political uncertainty in the United States today, we are living in unique and scary times. I don’t think it’s a stretch to say something is changing in this regard. The problem is that we are in a very uncertain place. As of now, it seems those changes are for the worse. However, remember, the darkest hour is right before the dawn.
Technology has also changed the way we live, the way we communicate, the way we isolate ourselves like we never have before. Most of us get stuck in loops, whether we endlessly scroll social media, work online, watch porn, or create content, it begins to feel like a repetitive and negative cycle.
I’m moving toward something new.
I’m tired of working 9-5. But I’m also tired of creating content that doesn’t seem to reach many people. It all starts to feel in vain. I keep doing the same things over and over. Of course, I work for the money, the need to survive. Creating content likely works in a similar fashion, I do it for the need to express myself. It’s also therapeutical.
But I often wish that my content could manifest itself to be more helpful to more people. I’m a teacher at heart. In fact, I hope to retire from academic advising and teach part time as soon as it feels financially doable.
But what if my content could reach more people and I could teach others things that might be life changing? I often think about this, and often feel like something is leading me in a direction where that could happen. I just don’t know exactly where.
On the other hand, I’ve played this blogging-writing-songwriting game long enough to know that there is no magic. You can’t gain a larger audience without a lot of work or a lot of luck.
That said, I enjoy creating content, other than the fact it can feel like another endless loop. If I could actually reach more people and help others change their lives, I would. I’m just not sure it’s going to happen.
So again, there is no finality.
Like many of my short essays, I’m not sure exactly what the point is. Futility? There is no finality. I don’t know what I’ll be doing in five minutes or five years. For now, I’ll continue working my day job, writing here, and posting songs on my YouTube channel.
But something is changing. I feel it. I just hope it’s changing for the better.
Let’s stay in touch. – dse
